By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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