were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
