What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
