what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
