i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
