your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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