he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
