I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
