Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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