Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
