do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
accomplished twins. life is a go
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
