Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
