and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
