Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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