i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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