Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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