The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
