Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
