The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Is it penis luge time yet?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
