is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
