The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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