Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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