just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
