...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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