Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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