I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
