so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Dignity is for republicans.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
