she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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