Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Farmville is her only friend.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize