lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
