i think my mom watched the whole time
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize