I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Soap is not a condiment
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
