sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
