So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
