Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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