Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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