Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Let's get the cat blown out
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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