I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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