And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
my liver is dry heaving
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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