Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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