Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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