If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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