absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Dick very happy bro
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
