im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
