Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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