the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
