So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
