babies were throwing up all over the place
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
