problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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