Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
As shirtless as possible
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
